As time goes by, I am now searching for the ones who have that inner light that shines though. I think those of you who read know that I talk a lot about seeing the aura of that glow. From my experience, I know that I can stand in that sunshine, but I also know that it can diminish, if I don’t let myself stand in front of it. My character has changed over the years of constantly looking at, and sharing my defects not with holding anything, but it is slow and arduous, however the results are unbelievably rewarding. I didn’t know any of this before sobriety, but I am also aware that I must have to look into that darkness of despair, and try to help those that are lost in the evil of wrong intent and twisted reality. I know I don’t have a very bright aura, but the Spirit has let me know, that it is also there in the darkness standing with me, letting me know that yet the light is dim sometimes in me, it still is the light of the Spirit, that’s been Graced and given me. I know I can look straight in your eyes whether you are in the light or darkness and have no fear, or be alone as long as I wake in the morning and pray for light, and before I go to sleep pray the light stays with me. I also know that there are many who have come before and after that live through the same light I have come to know, and they are always with me. I was told that I could walk in the sunshine of the spirit as long as I find the unity with the gift of service and a love greater than I, may I never forget or separate.
Peace Out: M copyright 2014

There are so many questions we have when we first come to the room. I never questioned why I was drinking and for most of my life, how do I stop. I can’t tell anyone, what it will take, it’s a question that can be answered only by where are we, and the circumstances of our life, and the lack of answers we have at that moment. This makes things pliable; we may be ready to be molded, by a method that can change our lives. The realization that we have to concede to the depths of our soul that we are Alcoholics/Addicts, and if we drink we will only dig the hole deeper and it may take us to our graves. These are real truths, but yet many of us will ignore this, until it’s too late, we desperately want to control things, and even though we know where the drink always takes us, to lack of control. Then our lives become unmanageable not always on the outside, but most do know what the feelings are inside. It took me 30 years and an enormous of amount of damage to my body, mind and soul, to finally come to that surrender; I truly know that I am one of the blessed. There are so many of us who let this take us down that merciless road of loneliness and despair. Every day in groups around the world the prayers go out for those who live in that hopeless existence of addiction to any substance, that becomes our higher power. Every morning and evening I thank my Greater Power for having mercy on this Alcoholic/Addict and for the gift of giving me a daily reprieve. Thanks for the 12 step call my brothers and sisters.
Peace Out: M copyright 2014