Over the years there have been many fact facing realities, all of them were never easy to admit or deal with. Those years of running from facts and living on replacing facts with fiction, was my existence, I didn’t admit to what the truth was. Many of us even in our sober life still run from the facts and the result is that, when we don’t take that fact finding tour, it will kill us as sure as the drink will. We hear every day that people with years of sobriety, end up taking our own lives, over not facing the facts of pure emotions. I know the idea of this has crossed my mind many times, because I didn’t want to face the fact that, I have to connect with the Power to find faith once more. This is exhausting, and I live with sloth and the feelings of loneliness, which can only be cured for me, by remembering that God has carried me through much, and am I willing to continue this walk by working towards that faith. I must stay in the face of these facts, or I will not know purpose. The purpose of existence is really just to serve each other, this is written in every Spiritual ideology. We have survived as a species through community, this is fact, together we conquer alone we die. For me life is beautiful as long as I never forget the fact that the Power lies between you and I, alone I will not see that power. Without this Power I sincerely have the solitary loneliness of myself, now that’s hopelessness.
Peace Out: M copyright 2014

As time goes by, I am now searching for the ones who have that inner light that shines though. I think those of you who read know that I talk a lot about seeing the aura of that glow. From my experience, I know that I can stand in that sunshine, but I also know that it can diminish, if I don’t let myself stand in front of it. My character has changed over the years of constantly looking at, and sharing my defects not with holding anything, but it is slow and arduous, however the results are unbelievably rewarding. I didn’t know any of this before sobriety, but I am also aware that I must have to look into that darkness of despair, and try to help those that are lost in the evil of wrong intent and twisted reality. I know I don’t have a very bright aura, but the Spirit has let me know, that it is also there in the darkness standing with me, letting me know that yet the light is dim sometimes in me, it still is the light of the Spirit, that’s been Graced and given me. I know I can look straight in your eyes whether you are in the light or darkness and have no fear, or be alone as long as I wake in the morning and pray for light, and before I go to sleep pray the light stays with me. I also know that there are many who have come before and after that live through the same light I have come to know, and they are always with me. I was told that I could walk in the sunshine of the spirit as long as I find the unity with the gift of service and a love greater than I, may I never forget or separate.
Peace Out: M copyright 2014