We always hear around the rooms how grateful we are to be sober, and that is a very genuine reality for us as a group. However gratitude for me does not always jump from one day to the next. It seems to have its own illusive way of slipping from conscious thought, it to a stew of fear, anger, mistrust, and self-pity, I don’t have to do anything to have those precious thoughts, all I have to is just wake up. Then as I allow them to permeate in my mind, I start to blame it on everything except me. My first sponsor told me point blank, to “stay in the solution not the problem”, so when those moments that I live in the problem of me, I have to start working towards solutions to gain perspective, and remember how blessed I am. There are so many blessings that I could tap into if I try, but I must do what I have been taught to do in those moments of ungratefulness, I must work step 11, and pray and meditate and seek the gratitude that I have allowed myself to forget. I know from my experience that as soon I start the process of the 12th step which is the principle of service, the prayer for me to delivered from that moment of ungratefulness, is answered trough the unity of reaching out, carrying a message, helping those who need help, that ends up bring me to another day of, being sober, safe, and loved, for it is the process to jump back into GRATITUDE, for another day.
Peace Out: M copyright 2014