When I first came into recovery it was highly and severely directed to take commitments, and be of service. I did this with some reservations; I took on any commitments selectively up to that point. Anything that I thought was not beneficial to me; I would manipulate my way out of it, or just make up some conveniently reasonable lie. So when I was suggested to do things that were inconvenient, it was hard to see the true intent behind that suggestion. Within a short time, I started to meet people and became part of the community of AA. It led me into a new reality of friendship, and service. As time progressed, this one word, commitment became larger, leading me to learning more about consistency and becoming accountable. I started to become more aware of what accountability to others meant, this would become an integral part of my life. By me doing esteem-able acts, it would change my esteem for others and me. My commitment to myself, and to others has become, the foundation of my life, if someone asks me for help, and I say “what do you need”, if I make that statement, I need to understand that I am making a commitment, and if I do, I have to be willing to go to any length for this person if they are willing to be helped. The other realization about commitment is, when I pray and ask the Great Spirit to help relieve me of a conflict that I have, I must commit myself to do my part to change through action, If I neglect and just pray, and do nothing towards the actions, of honoring the commitment I have entrusted to that Great Spirit, nothing changes. Learning to commit came to me through surrendering myself and my will to the bigger will of the commitments I have made.
Peace Out: M