I was emphatically told to clean house, trust God, and help others, this was the way to sober living. For me the helping others, was not too hard, once I sobered up and realized my selfish self-seeking ways. Trusting God first came in the form of trusting men who were desperate to help me find the path, to live by Spiritual Principles. However giving up control is always an uphill battle; there are times when I think my actions are not based on self-will, but after the fact I can see my trying to control is written all over the outcome. Now when it comes to cleaning house I know that even when I think it’s clean, there is always clutter lurking. This is where the 10th step is critical for me; I must forever stand by vigilance as the key word, so as not to create wreckage in my present. The wreckage is not always visible to the naked mind, but disguised in the slough of my taking action, on keeping my side of the street clean. I have to confess that vigilance is preceded by self-righteous thought that I am right. My mind tells me that there is nothing to clean; since I did nothing that caused me to even consider, the hurt in my actions. Now I must really look again at the first principle, which is that of HONESTY, my favorite subject, and my biggest short coming, which is to see the dishonesty which creates the clutter in the first place. But here I trudge to find that path that allows me that daily reprieve, from the imperfection of me. Thank you for teaching me a way to at least carry a bucket and a broom, to help me clean the dirtiest corners of my life.
Peace Out: M copyright 2014
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