How do I really know that I am willing to do whatever it takes to set aside all those things that stand between me, and the rest of the world! After I took a look at all those things that created damage and pain, I had to understand what defects of my character were involved in creating that destruction. Even though I had become willing to make changes, I had to ask the power of my better self, to have the courage to identify, and confront those I had harmed. Truly, I needed to do all of this, without expecting anything in return, this is really the moment I felt the true experience of unconditional love, and humility. From that moment I experienced a change in me. Freedom of me and the binding of self-abuse, it was one of the most amazing feelings of my existence. However this is an ongoing endeavor, I must continue on day to day, being forever diligent in this way. I can be fooled that I can take my control and will back. If I become complacent or drop my guard, I stand in great danger of losing this freedom that I cherish. Knowledge of this truly is an awareness of my higher conscious, this was described to me as a Higher Power. It’s the way I have chosen the path, which was chosen for me, but by the Grace of God I go. None of this is an easy thing to achieve, there are many things that we either overcome, or make difficult because of the fear, or pleasure these defects give us. Some of these things are instinctual, primal needs, others are habitual, and both are hard to let go, but for me I have to continue to make every effort to rectify. I am as guilty as one can be, trying letting go but unwilling to release, those things that prevent me from earning a better seat on the “Train to Jordan”, but I am damn sure trying to upgrade my ticket.
PEACE OUT. M